We are a full two-weeks into the re-siding project on our
twenty-plus-year-old house. The crew are fantastic - easy-going, friendly,
skilled and expert at problem-solving.
And we have a few problems.
Our favorite problem is a carpenter ant nest. We knew it was there (somewhere!)
and had been paying quite a bit of cash to have the problem eradicated... but
obviously the hippy stuff we had ordered did not work on these carpenter ants.
Our carpenter ants needed a nuclear bomb. Our carpenter ants
are total jerks and deserve to die a slow and painful death.
And why, exactly, are they called "carpenter" ants when all they do is destroy
wood? I propose a world-wide re-naming campaign to rebrand the species as
"sawdust" ants. Anyone want to join my crusade?
All the wood in the "infected area" will be replaced. A thermonuclear device
will be deployed and the ants will be history in our 'hood.
Mother Nature retaliated from our bleach-water spray attack: a Queen Ant (with
wings!) bit me yesterday.
Bitch. Be. Dead. Now.
Our house is slowly being re-covered in baby-poop-yellow
Re-siding this home is a massive under-taking and should
not be needed again until we have both been seen by an undertaker.
As soon as the re-siding project is finished, the painters will arrive
and paint the house "off-white".
Siding is replaced from the bottom-to-the-top. The Tyvek
paper is being swapped to another (better, newer) barrier film. New
exterior lamps will arrive this week.
We are a mess, but everything is coming-together well
and the job should be finished within a week.
Good thing. A certain Little Boy is turning three on Saturday.
ANOTHER UPDATE: After eating steak at our house Monday, Dustin and Matthew ran
ten miles in one hour Tuesday. This is not a typo. They ran ten six-minute miles.
Until my next update, I remain, your lethal correspondent.
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